Category Archives: adiposity

I am very corpulent. It’s not my fault

Screen Shot 2015-06-16 at 08.12.19Like my hoarding disorder, my penetration disorder, my caffeine-induced sleep disorder, my sex addiction, my impulse-control disorder, my sexual aversion disorder, my anorexia, my social phobia, my oppositional defiant disorder, my lepidopterophobia, my depression, my hypoactive sexual desire disorder and my gambling disorder, my adiposity is a disease. I blame

  • the food manufacturers
  • my childhood
  • chemical imbalance
  • restaurants. Portions are too big
  • brain scans
  • genes
  • evolution
  • neurochemistry
  • my parents. I hate my parents, don’t you?

Corpulency follows self-indulgence

Screen Shot 2013-03-09 at 00.38.47Adiposity, writes Dalrymple,

is a natural consequence of overeating, which is to say of human weakness.

English gastronomic cretinism

Screen Shot 2014-01-09 at 15.20.03

Cuisine britannique: le chip butty

I beseech you in the bowels of Christ, must you eat that muck?

An important feature of the profoundly unappealing modern British, writes Dalrymple,

is their lack of self-control. They scream their obscenities in the street, eat everywhere they go, and leave litter behind them. They are opposed to self-control on grounds of health and safety. They see self-control as psychologically harmful or impossible: self-control is the enemy of self-expression, without which their existences would be poisoned as if by an unopened abscess.

The idea that sugar is addictive is

music to their ears. Not only is self-control bad for you, it has been proved (by science) to be impossible. Further good news is that fatness is genetic. Never has Man’s eternal urge to excuse himself received so much authoritative support.

The debased British

are among the fattest people on earth. Much of the economy is the Soviet Union with takeaway pizza.

Meals are

nasty, solitary, British, short, and frequent. The elementary social discipline of eating with others is lost. The Englishman’s street is his dining room. Streets are littered with the detritus of junk food. Were it not for smoking, the British would be even fatter.

Many billions of pounds of public expenditure

have made the dream of the political class come true: people have become the product of their environment, all needful of official assistance.

Pessimists, despair not!

Screen Shot 2013-12-11 at 13.26.38Creutzfeld-Jakob disease, AIDS and the Ebola virus have proved disappointing and dementia rates are falling but

there are grounds for thinking that improvement may not last. The increase in obesity and type II diabetes may reverse the trend. The fatties of today will be the dements of tomorrow. That is, of course, if no treatment is discovered in the meantime that cures type II diabetes or prevents its deleterious effects, so that people will be able to have their cake and not suffer the consequences.

The corpulence of the English

An English rose

An English rose

Arriving in his home country by air recently, Dalrymple is struck by how fat and poorly accoutred Britishers are.

Not just pleasantly plump, but enormously obese, so that their adiposity seemed almost to suffocate them and made locomotion laborious.

They were all very badly dressed,

showing themselves to maximum disadvantage. It is possible for fat women to dress with dignity, but those at the airport had all squeezed themselves into the tightest and scantiest clothes.