Category Archives: NHS apparatchiks

Dalrymple’s quaint and archaic dialect

Compared to the prose of NHS managers, that of the British Medical Journal is as Edward Gibbon

From Fowler's Dictionary of Modern English Usage, ed. Jeremy Butterfield, 2015

From Fowler’s Dictionary of Modern English Usage, ed. Jeremy Butterfield, 2015

Who on earth would want to be a doctor?

Screen Shot 2016-03-24 at 21.04.40Dalrymple points to the

steep decline in the attractiveness of medicine as a vocation, profession and career.

And no one

who ever experienced an ordinary Soviet hospital will be in any doubt as to what a decline in the prestige of the profession meant to patients.

It has long been the goal of the government, he points out,

to deprofessionalise medicine and to turn its practice into a mere job. An independent profession, with its high standards and old traditions, is dangerous to the government, especially when it is as respected as the medical profession, in a way in which a mere group of shift workers will never be. Shift work dehumanises patients and deprives the work of most of its satisfaction. It is also grossly inefficient.

The independence of doctors

has eroded almost completely, and you cannot expect highly educated people who have undergone a long and strenuous training to remain contented for very long with being harried and reprimanded by people who are of lower calibre than themselves.

A vivid exemplification of the New Hospital Order is the noticeboard in the corridor of the hospital in which Dalrymple works, which

informs the public of the senior staff of the hospital. The senior consultants, all men of considerable distinction, appear on the fifth and bottom row, under four rows of bureaucrats. The impression is given that they are of very minor significance.

The shortening of training,

both graduate and postgraduate, is another straw in the wind. New hospital consultants do not have the breadth of experience that old consultants had at their appointment, and this is because doctors are increasingly regarded as technicians and nothing more.

Triumph of the careerist dimwits

Screen Shot 2016-03-03 at 08.55.53The ambitious but ungifted advance relentlessly

Dalrymple attends a conference about some forthcoming changes to the NHS. One of the lectures is given by

a lady apparatchik whose grimacing attempts at smiles, and whose bodily writhing as she tortured the English language with neologisms, acronyms and platitudes in the service of evident untruth, made Gordon Brown’s bonhomie seem like a model of spontaneity.

At one point there is

a single guffaw of contemptuous laughter. It was an illuminating moment, a flash of lightning in a moonless night-time landscape. For a moment I felt almost sorry for the speaker: you could see the panic on her face, a fear lest 150 doctors turn on her and demand explanations in comprehensible language.

Alas,

doctors are far too well brought up and chivalrous. Or is it pusillanimous?